Quotes to inspire and reflect

Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished.

Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance.

All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies are ended by a marriage.

A marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit.

Marriage is a very good thing, but I think it's a mistake to make a habit out of it.

Love the quest; marriage the conquest; divorce the inquest.

It is always incomprehensible to a man that a woman should refuse an offer of marriage.

Marriage is the operation by which a woman's vanity and a man's egotism are extracted without an anesthetic.

Twenty years of romance makes a woman look like a ruin; but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building.

If there is such a thing as a good marriage, it is because it resembles friendship rather than love.

It was a perfect marriage. She didn't want to and he couldn't.

In marriage, as in war, it is permitted to take every advantage of the enemy.

The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.

Marriage is the miracle that transforms a kiss from a pleasure into a duty.

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.

After a few years of marriage a man can look right at a woman without seeing her and a woman can see right through a man without looking at him.

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.

Show me a woman who doesn't feel guilty and I'll show you a man.

Pleasure for one hour, a bottle of wine. Pleasure for one year a marriage; but pleasure for a lifetime, a garden.

Women are the only exploited group in history to have been idealized into powerlessness.

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows, marriage does.

Marriage is the one subject on which all women agree and all men disagree.

A liberated woman is one who has sex before marriage and a job after.

Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.

Before marriage, a man will go home and lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage, he'll go to sleep before you finish saying it.

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his check book open.

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

Marriage is neither heaven nor hell, it is simply purgatory.

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.

The trouble with many married people is that they are trying to get more out of marriage than there is in it.

To keep your marriage brimming with love in the loving cup; whenever you're wrong, admit it, whenever you're right, shut up.

The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding.

Marriage is for women the commonest mode of livelihood, and the total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution.

God's great cosmic joke on the human race was requiring that men and women live together in marriage.

Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can't figure out what from.

It is a woman's business to get married as soon as possible, and a man's to keep unmarried as long as possible.

There are no good girls gone wrong - just bad girls found out.

I would always rather be happy than dignified.

Women prefer emotions to reasoning.

Being a woman is a terribly difficult task, since it consists principally in dealing with men.

Only men who are not interested in women are interested in women's clothes. Men who like women never notice what they wear.

One can find women who have never had one love affair, but it is rare indeed to find any who have had only one.

Women are like teabags. We don't know our true strength until we are in hot water!

Women are like elephants. I like to look at 'em, but I wouldn't want to own one.

Women are nothing but machines for producing children.

Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics should be told not to fuck.

Beware of the man who denounces women writers; his penis is tiny and he cannot spell.

They say women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men.