Punctuality is the virtue of the bored.

You never find an Englishman among the under-dogs - except in England, of course.

We cherish our friends not for their ability to amuse us, but for our ability to amuse them.

The great charm in argument is really finding one’s own opinions, not other people’s .

DON’T HOLD YOUR PARENTS UP TO CONTEMPT. AFTER ALL… IT IS JUST POSSIBLE THAT YOU MAY TAKE AFTER THEM.

WHAT IS YOUTH EXCEPT A MAN OR A WOMAN BEFORE IT IS READY OR FIT TO BE SEEN?

A typical triumph of modern science to find the only part of Randolph that was not malignant and remove it.

News is what a chap who doesn’t care much about anything wants to read. And it’s only news until he’s read it. After that it’s dead.

‘Feather-footed through the plashy fen passes the questing vole’ … ‘Yes,’ said the Managing Editor. ‘That must be good style.’

Up to a point, Lord Copper.