Quotes to inspire and reflect

The 100% American is 99% an idiot.

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles. G.K.

For the first year of marriage I had basically a bad attitude.

The major sin is the sin of being born.

I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back.

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference.

The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animals

No normal man ever fell in love after thirty when the kidneys begin to disintegrate

Life is either always a tight-rope or a featherbed. Give me a tight-rope.

No president in history has been more vilified or was more vilivied during the time he was President than Lincoln. Those who knew him, his secretaries, have written that he was deeply hurt by what was said about him and drawn about him, but on the other hand, Lincoln had the great strength of character never to display it, always able to stand tall and strong and firm no matter how harsh or unfair the criticism might be. These elements of greatness, of course, inspire us all today.

There are times when one would like to end the whole human race, and finish the farce.

I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.

As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand. Josh Billings #1043 It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you: the one to slander you, and the other to bring the news to you.

A duty dodged is like a debt unpaid; it is only deferred, and we must come back and settle the account at last. Joseph F.

Henry James would have been vastly improved as a novelist by a few whiffs of the Chicago stockyard

There are women whose infidelities are the only link they still have with their husbands.

Henry James writes fiction as if it were a painful duty.

Henry James was one of the nicest old ladies I ever met.

Finishing a book is just like you took a child out in the back yard and shot it.

Indolence is a delightful but distressing state; we must be doing something to be happy.

The holy passion of Friendship is so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.

Adultery is the application of democracy to love

The only man who is really free is the one who can turn down an invitation to dinner without giving any excuse.

Since the whole affair had become one of religion, the vanquished were of course exterminated.

California: The west coast of Iowa.

Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton.

I do not believe the expenditure of $2.50 for a book entitles the purchaser to the personal friendship of the author.

What once were vices are manners now.

By definition, a government has no conscience. Sometimes it has a policy, but nothing more.

A misery is not to be measured from the nature of the evil, but from the temper of the sufferer.

The best hope is that one of these days the ground will get disgusted enough just to walk away - leaving people with nothing more to stand on than what they have so bloody well stood for up to now.

A country which proposes to make use of modern war as an instrument of policy must possess a highly centralized, all-powerful executive, hence the absurdity of talking about the defense of democracy by force of arms. A democracy which makes or effectively prepares for modern scientific war must necessarily cease to be democratic.

The greatest mystery is not that we have been flung at random between the profusion of matter and of the stars, but that within this prison we can draw from ourselves images powerful enough to deny our nothingness.

Newspapers should have no friends.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution

Even holligans marry, though they know that marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever.

The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be.

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.

In expressing love we belong among the undeveloped countries.

The affair between Margot Asquith and Margot Asquith will live as one of the prettiest love stories in all literature.

A married man with a family will do anything for money.

The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore

Being a woman is of special interest to aspiring male transexuals. To actual women it is simply a good excuse not to play football.

Our ignorance of history makes us libel our own times. People have always been like this.

Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.

He that is of the opinion money will do everything may well be suspected of doing everything for money.

Philosophy is to the real world as masturbation is to sex.

If only it was as easy to banish hunger by rubbing the belly as it is to masturbate.