Poems List

Money couldn’t buy friends but you got a better class of enemy.

Puckoon (1963) ch. 6

1

Unto Us...

Unto Us...
Somewhere at some time
They committed themselves to me
And so, I was!
Small, but I WAS!
Tiny, in shape
Lusting to live
I hung in my pulsing cave.
Soon they knew of me
My mother --my father.
I had no say in my being
I lived on trust
And love
Tho' I couldn't think
Each part of me was saying
A silent 'Wait for me
I will bring you love!'
I was taken
Blind, naked, defenseless
By the hand of one
Whose good name
Was graven on a brass plate
in Wimpole Street,
and dropped on the sterile floor
of a foot operated plastic waste
bucket.
There was no Queens Counsel
To take my brief.
The cot I might have warmed
Stood in Harrod's shop window.
When my passing was told
My father smiled.
No grief filled my empty space.
My death was celebrated
With tickets to see Danny la Rue
Who was pretending to be a woman
Like my mother was.
268

Welcome Home

Welcome Home
Unaware of my crime
they stood me in the dock.
I was sentenced to life....
without her.
Strange trial.
No judge.
No jury.
I wonder who my visitors will be.
241

The Dog Lovers

The Dog Lovers
So they bought you
And kept you in a
Very good home
Cental heating
TV
A deep freeze
A very good home-
No one to take you
For that lovely long run-
But otherwise
'A very good home'
They fed you Pal and Chun
But not that lovely long run,
Until, mad with energy and boredom
You escaped- and ran and ran and ran
Under a car.
Today they will cry for you-
Tomorrow they will but another dog.
239

The Soldiers at Lauro

The Soldiers at Lauro
Young are our dead
Like babies they lie
The wombs they blest once
Not healed dry
And yet - too soon
Into each space
A cold earth falls
On colder face.
Quite still they lie
These fresh-cut reeds
Clutched in earth
Like winter seeds
But they will not bloom
When called by spring
To burst with leaf
And blossoming
They sleep on
In silent dust
As crosses rot
And helmets rust.
204

So Fair is She

So Fair is She
So fair is she!
So fair her face
So fair her pulsing figure
Not so fair
The maniacal stare
Of a husband who's much bigger.
221

Teeth

Teeth
English Teeth, English Teeth!
Shining in the sun
A part of British heritage
Aye, each and every one.
English Teeth, Happy Teeth!
Always having fun
Clamping down on bits of fish
And sausages half done.
English Teeth! HEROES' Teeth!
Hear them click! and clack!
Let's sing a song of praise to them -
Three Cheers for the Brown Grey and Black.
227

On the Ning Nang Nong

On the Ning Nang Nong
On the Ning Nang Nong
Where the Cows go Bong!
and the monkeys all say BOO!
There's a Nong Nang Ning
Where the trees go Ping!
And the tea pots jibber jabber joo.
On the Nong Ning Nang
All the mice go Clang
And you just can't catch 'em when they do!
So its Ning Nang Nong
Cows go Bong!
Nong Nang Ning
Trees go ping
Nong Ning Nang
The mice go Clang
What a noisy place to belong
is the Ning Nang Ning Nang Nong!!
294

Porridge

Porridge
Why is there no monument
To Porridge in our land?
It it's good enough to eat,
It's good enough to stand!
On a plinth in London
A statue we should see
Of Porridge made in Scotland
Signed, "Oatmeal, O.B.E."
(By a young dog of three)
227

Maveric

Maveric
Maveric Prowles
Had Rumbling Bowles
That thundered in the night.
It shook the bedrooms all around
And gave the folks a fright.
The doctor called;
He was appalled
When through his stethoscope
He heard the sound of a baying hound,
And the acrid smell of smoke.
Was there a cure?
'The higher the fewer'
The learned doctor said,
Then turned poor Maveric inside out
And stood him on his head.
'Just as I though
You've been and caught
An Asiatic flu -
You musn't go near dogs I fear
Unless they come near you.'
Poor Maveric cried.
He went cross-eyed,
His legs went green and blue.
The doctor hit him with a club
And charged him one and two.
And so my friend
This is the end,
A warning to the few:
Stay clear of doctors to the end
Or they'll get rid of you.
248

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Identification and basic context

Spike Milligan, born Terence Alan Milligan, was a British comedian, writer, musician, and actor. He is widely regarded as a pioneer of modern British comedy and a key figure in the surreal and anarchic humor that characterized much of 20th-century British entertainment. His comedic genius was often intertwined with a profound sensitivity and a sometimes dark, melancholic outlook on life. Milligan was a lifelong advocate for peace, deeply affected by his experiences in World War II.

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Literary trajectory

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Cultural and historical context

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Personal life

Milligan's personal life was marked by considerable emotional turbulence, including struggles with depression and a form of post-traumatic stress disorder stemming from his wartime experiences. He was married twice and had children. His relationships were often complex, and his mental health challenges were a recurring theme he openly addressed, often with his characteristic dark humor. He was known for his eccentricities and his deeply sensitive nature.

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Interpretation and critical analysis

Critics often analyze Milligan's work through the lens of existentialism and absurdism, noting how his humor serves as a coping mechanism for the inherent chaos and suffering in life, particularly in the context of war. His blending of the profoundly silly with the deeply tragic is a key element of his artistic appeal, prompting discussions about the nature of comedy, trauma, and the human condition.

Curiosities and lesser-known aspects

Milligan was an accomplished jazz musician and often incorporated music into his performances and writings. He was also an avid painter. Despite his public persona as a zany comedian, he was known to be intensely private and often struggled with the pressures of fame. He famously detested the imperial system and campaigned for Britain to adopt the metric system.

Death and memory

Spike Milligan passed away in 2002. His death was widely mourned, and his legacy continues to be celebrated through retrospectives, re-releases of his work, and continued academic and popular interest in his unique contributions to comedy and literature.