A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.

The pencil sharpener is about as far as I have ever got in operating a complicated piece of machinery with any success.

Tell us your phobias, and we will tell you what you are afraid of.

The only cure for a real hangover is death.

I know I’m drinking myself to a slow death, but then I’m in no hurry.

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.

I wouldn't trust a bank that would lend money to such a poor risk as me.

I do most of my work sitting down; that's where I shine.

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.

STREETS FLOODED. PLEASE ADVISE. message sent on arriving in Venice