Humor e Ironia

A fool can throw a stone in a pond that a 100 wise men can’t get out.

I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry, because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?

Life is too important to be taken seriously.

Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.

Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.

Love is being stupid together.

To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.

By all means marry; if you get a good wife you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one you’ll become a philosopher .

And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.

My wife and I tried to breakfast together, but we had to stop or our marriage would have been wrecked.

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance.

Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished.

All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies are ended by a marriage.

A marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit.

Love the quest; marriage the conquest; divorce the inquest.

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.

Show me a woman who doesn't feel guilty and I'll show you a man.

Marriage is the one subject on which all women agree and all men disagree.

Before marriage, a man will go home and lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage, he'll go to sleep before you finish saying it.

Telling lies is a fault in a boy, an art in a lover, an accomplishment in a bachelor, and second-nature in a married man.

Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near.

Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.