I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening—but this wasn’t it.

One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife.

Home is where you hang your head.

My mother loved children—she would have given anything if I had been one.

Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.

We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife.

She got her good looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.